I've been listening to Air Supply quite a bit today.
Now that I've made you all throw up in your mouths, let me explain. It's purely out of nostalgia - sort of like a smell that takes you back to being a little kid and walking into your neighbor's house (which for me would be cigarette exhaust, beer, and dried up dog piss).
When I pop in Air Supply and hear that choral crescendo consisting of about 30 overdubbed layers of that little short guy's voice in "Lost In Love", I am instantly transported back to 1982. I find myself sitting in the passenger side of my parent's gigantor poop brown Country Squire station wagon. Here... let me put my headphones on. Join me, why don't you?
*Intro guitar part for "Lost In Love" kicks in*
Welcome to the Country Squire.. it's pretty bitchin', ain't it?! Check out the radio - there's a little orange LED light on the display betwixt the huge silver dials. That light goes on when the radio receives an actual stereo signal. High tech stuff here. And you'll see it's shining proud and brilliantly right now. Solid orange LED light = 8 track is on and churning out a thick, creamy tidal wave of Air Supply. We got ABBA and Neil Sedaka in the house too.. if you want to hear any of those, crack the glove box open and have at it. Careful, though - it's a pretty big glove box door and may very well mash your kneecaps in if you aren't careful. You might find some chocolate stars or peanuts in there - eat at your own risk. Leave the tire gauge in there please; I like to play with it while Dad is in Knox Lumber.
The vehicle's aroma is quite pleasant, yes? That fragrance is a combination of vinyl seats, Dad's Old Spice afta-shave, and Score hair gel. It is particularly noticeable on a hot summer afternoon. Dad drives this bitch to work every day. Ooh if I could only get a nice white knuckle grip on the Squire's steering wheel and fire that engine up. I'd ram my foot on the gas and wait for the tires to squeal, although we all know that wouldn't happen. I would ram my foot on the gas and the engine would likely flood and kill.. but not without a few of those rattly sputters and revved up coughing sounds that cars in that day and age were known to make. The Pinto does this and I laugh every time.
If you'll look under the driver's side seat, you'll see an empty Sports Shake can. And if it's cold out, you may score big time and nab an unopened one.
The Country Squire was not a station wagon.. it was an Eco Community. It magically provided things like music, candy, and Sport Shakes. That along with its spacious interior make it the one safe place I'd want to be if giant robots that shot death rays out of their eyes ever came to overthrow the Earth and kill us all.
The Squire has power windows too. See that 3" chrome panel on your door with the toggle switch in the middle (similar to the one on the driver's door which is 4 times the size and has 5 toggles)? That provides you with an Air Supply of a different kind: the one you need running through your hair when you're cruising highway 61 at 45mph listening to the calming, androgynous voice of Russell Hitchcock. There's even a power window on the back door which might I mention also has defrosting capabilities. Only half of them work though, so you get a nice American Flag-looking pattern in the winter.
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Ah, cripes. The CD is over. My Air Supply has been cut off. How symbolic of a statement that is: Here I am back in 2005 with $62 in my bank account.
Someday when I listen to Air Supply, I'm going to be magically carried off in that hot air balloon on their record cover and end up playing with the band. I'd totally pick up a keytar and jam with them.
We will be on a billowy pink cloud in a blue sky and everything will be glittery. A rainbow made out of taffy will unfurl like a red carpet and end on our cloud, and just as we break into the ending passage to "Lost In Love", a unicorn will come running over the rainbow leaving a comet trail of shimmery dust in its path. I will pick off a piece of the cloud which will be made of cotton candy and feed it to the unicorn. And then I will put a muffin on his horn, hop on it's back, and be taken off to La La Land. I will look back and see the 18 members of Air Supply gazing up at me and waving ever so gently.
