I don't really understand it... we were driving home last night and before I knew it (or even thought it), my mouth was open and spewing these words: "Man... root beer really sounds good right now." It has been about 14 hours since that, and I haven't been able to let it go. Every time I close my eyes I see this:
A giant bottle of A&W. The sides of the bottle have a thin film of condensation on it which are beginning to accumulate into water drops that become so heavy they eventually have no choice but to glide down the brown white and orange label and onto the bottom of the bottle. A water ring eventually forms beneath the bottle, but in my mind I say "don't worry Mom, I know it's on a wood table, but I put a napkin under the bottle as to not leave a mark." I go to reach for the bottle, and then open my eyes only to realize there isn't one there. I then start to shiver, cry, regroup, and try to get on with the day.
I should have given in earlier today when I was at Super America, but I didn't. I wanted to get a fountain beverage because those are only 69 cents (a bottle is nearly twice that price and money isn't necessarily growing on trees for me right now), and all they had on tap was MUG brand root beer, which is so... generic and icky. I wanted A&W and nothing else. Had I gotten a MUG, that would have been like eating cold cuts on Thanksgiving instead of actual turkey. I instead opted for a rather unsatisfying Diet Coke, hoping this intense sugary craving would soon dissipate. Well.. 6 hours later and it hasn't. I'm dying here. Every time I close my eyes, all I see is that sweaty bottle of A&W.
At one point I looked at the cat and he suddenly took on the appearance of a bottle of root beer. Next thing I knew he was screeching at me because I had mistook his head for a bottle cap and was trying to unscrew it.
Apparently my body is lacking some obscure nutrient and/or vitamin that nutritionists and chemists have not yet discovered in A&W but can only be found in A&W.. and my body is trying to tell me via this inexplicable craving. I'm not necessarily a root beer maniac - I mean, I like a good cold one every so often, and even a float on rare occasions... but it's mostly a warm weather drink for me. It's 20 degrees out right now and to get my A&W fix, I'd have to put my jacket on, freeze my ass off walking to SA, fork over the $1.09, and freeze my ass off walking back home. And I wouldn't be able to wait until I got home... Hell no, I'd crack that bottle right open as soon as I got out of SA and guzzle it like you see athletes doing on Gatorade commercials. I'd be standing there in 20 degree weather, just me and my bottle of A&W on our own little imaginary tropical island, and then I'd get honked at because I'd be too preoccupied with my bottle of A&W to be paying attention to the traffic I was walking into.
Screw this.. I'm getting my jacket on and going on a root beer run. Don't worry, I'll look both ways for cars before I crack the bottle open.
