Thanks to having a birthday on July 23rd, I am now 32. "Wow, Micycle, you're 32? But you appear to be so young, handsome, vibrant and full of life," you're all thinking. Well thanks. I credit that to not sitting around bitching about being old and just enjoying life instead. You're only given so much time before you're planted (thanks for that term, Cookie), so why not fill that time with enjoyment?!
Age never really bothers me the way it does some people. "Wah wah wah, I'm another year older - oh, I'm soooo old! I think I have another wrinkle!" Shut up! Take that energy you put into complaining and do something fun instead. Complaining about getting older is a waste of time, 'cause save for things like Oil of Olay, plastic surgery, Grape Nuts, and a few cosmetic products out there, nothing's going to reverse your age for you.
You can of course suspend your age by having your head frozen and then thawed out several years from now once they figure out how to put human heads on robots. That's going to be awesome when it happens, but by the time it does happen, everyone else you know that didn't choose to be frozen will be long gone. Or worse yet, they'll be rolling around in a wheelchair drooling on their teddy bears at a nursing home thinking that everybody they see is a grandchild of theirs.
This year for the first time I do have a gripe about my age. Not how it makes me feel, but just the numeric properties of the number 32 itself. Until now, there has always been a calendar day representative of my numeric age. I did not realize this until I turned 32 and then it dawned on me - hey, there's no 32nd day in any of the 12 months! So if you don't mind, I'm going to tack another day onto July and make this Monday July 32nd. July is one of my favorite months of the year and I certainly don't mind having one more day of it.
Just knock one out of August. We can stand to go without August 1st, yes? Or maybe there's a specific day in August where no one was born or nothing of any great signifigance happened. So maybe we could all do some research and get rid of that one. Okay?
I have a feeling this is what happened to February - a few days seem to be missing from the end of it with no explanation.. I'm guessing it's because perhaps the person that invented the calendar year was born in January and when he/she turned 30 realized that perhaps having a January 31st would be nice.
So please update your calendars for me and thanks ahead of time for your cooperation. Remember that on Monday if you have to write any checks out. Put "July 32nd" on the date line for me if you'd be so kind.
One cool thing about being 32, I guess, is that for one year my age is a palindrome of the day I was born on. On the 23rd, maybe I should have referred to turning 32 as my "yadhtriB nedloGGolden Birthday." It is also a palindrome of Kimb's age, and that's pretty sweet if you ask me.
Not sure what I'm going to do about turning 33, as I can't keep adding days onto the month of July every time I have a birthday. 33 is a palindrome of itself, so I guess I'll just have to go with that and maybe try and come up with something else in the mean time so's I can truly appreciate the number 33 when that's my age.
ps - Speaking of birthdays in July, Happy Belated Birthdays to Barry and VomitGod! It's a little known fact, but a prerequisite of being a drummer for Iced Ink is that you must have been born sometime in July.
