Tuesday, June 14, 2005

Introducing the antibacterial Nicotine Patch from the makers of Band-Aid

Just saw an ad on the TV for a nicotine patch and thought out loud, "Why not partner with the Band-Aid company and make a dual purpose bandage/nicotine patch?"

They could put the nicotine solution on the white cottony part of the bandage and who knows, perhaps it would make for a great anti-bacterial ointment as well. Plus if you had a patch adhered to your person, it might provide an extra comforting numbness you might not get otherwise and help ease the pain.. 'cause whatever is on the patch would be that much closer to entering your bloodstream.

This could be bad for people having a hard time quitting smoking as they might purposely cut or scrape themselves so they could use a patch... and on the flipside, it might be bad for non-smokers who think they're just putting a regular old Band-Aid on and get an unexpected rush of nausea and light-headedness. They may even start smoking as a result. And if people wanted Winnie The Pooh or Barney Band-Aids, it would send children the wrong message without them even knowing it. But if the company put a Surgeon General's warning on the box, something like "Frequent use of this product may cause addiction to Band-Aids" or "You must be 18 to buy these Band-Aids," that might be enough of a deterrent.

I can see it now... people hanging out in bars and at parties not smoking, but wearing Band-Aids instead. The air would be so much more breathable and clean; that is if you don't mind that weird clinical Band-Aid smell. "What happened to your finger, Jimmy?" "Oh nothing, just trying to quit smoking."

I guess if you have to put a warning label on something like Band-Aids which are designed to help you and not kill you, or at the very least spark an expensive addiction which wouldn't have happened otherwise, that might be sort of counterintuitive.

Yeah, now that I think about it, it's a pretty shitty idea. Never mind.