I had a strange dream the other night... We were in the Park High School auditorium (Park = me and my sibling's scholastic prison cell from grades 9-12). When I say "we", I have no recollection of who I was actually with in this particular dream, but I assume it was my sister. Why? My sister is a longtime fan of The Bruce Springsteen and I went to a Bruce concert with her once. He had the E. Street Band in tow and might I say they provided nearly 3 straight hours of ass kicking rock and roll bliss.
So ANYWAYS, back to my dream. We were anxiously awaiting the band to take the stage, and they did - minus Bruce. The band broke into song and created an intensity like none other as the crowd anticipated a Blues Brothers style entry of Bruce.
Eventually he popped out onto the stage with his trademark Fender Telecaster strapped on. The crowd went crazy, but I couldn't participate because I noticed something terribly different about him that no one else seemed to. He was wearing his usual tight jeans, shit-kickers, and button-up shirt - I remember it was a black and red flannel. But the one different thing about him was that he looked like he weighed 500 pounds. Bruce was bouncing all over the place and freaking me out something fierce, because last I remember seeing him, he was of an average build. Now he looked like Fat Bastard from the Austin Powers film - he also bore an uncanny resemblance to Weird Al in the "Fat" video.I kept looking at everyone with a "hey - do you notice anything...um...different??" look on my face, but no one seemed to be aware that Bruce had tripled in size. I guess you had to be there to get the full effect of seeing him rock out with his Teli behind his back, holding his mic stand and belting out "Born To Run" in my high school auditorium. I don't remember anything after that other than waking up very confused at 4am. I have not seen or heard anything about Bruce in months, yet I just had a dream about him like that. Man, brains are freaky things sometimes.
Here's where it gets a little Twilight Zoney - I talked to my sister today for the first time in a few days and guess what she mentioned? The fact that Bruce Springsteen is coming to town (insert "Psycho" violin shrieks here)
If it ends up that Bruce comes to town and does indeed weigh 500 pounds, this means my dreams posses the ability to predict some pretty random, crazy-ass shit. It also means I will likely initiate a steady intake of sleeping pills and try ever so hard to dream about me finding a guitar case with a 57 goldtop Les Paul in it cushioned by ten million dollars in cash money with a note on it that says this:
To: Mike. From: Santa.
