I've been making a point to go on daily hour long walks since I quit suckin' back on the cancer sticks. Being one of the 4 people left on earth that doesn't own an iPod (woe is me), I am left with my 7 year old CD walkman and one CD to keep me company on my strolls through the captivating and incredibly unaffordable scenery of the Kenwood area.
As of late, I've been busting out the old classic KISS CDs (Dressed to Kill and Rock And Roll Over for those who care, a.k.a. you, Lants). All of those songs are at an upbeat, brisk walking tempo that keeps you moving, not to mention I've been listening to them since I was 6 years old.. so the nostalgia/memories keep my mind occupied while I'm a-strollin'.
So anywho, something dawned on me halfway through Rock and Roll Over last night: Hey, all of these songs are about screwing! And I've been listening to them since I was oh so so young. Think of the subconscious detrimental effects that must have had on mine young virgin ears. For the majority of my adolescence, my psyche was constantly being berated with innuendo left and right via the mighty powers of simple, stupid rock and roll songs. I had no idea what most of it meant, obviously.. I have a cassette tape of me when I was 6 pretending to be Paul Stanley on the fake radio show I used to host saying "I want to make loooove to you.." Mmm hmm.
Let's take a look at what the songs on Rock And Roll Over are all abouts now, shall we?
1. I Want You - Screwing.
2. Take Me - Screwing.
3. Calling Dr. Love - Yup, screwing.
4. Ladies Room – Screwing.
5. Baby Driver - This one's a little tough to decipher, but I'm pretty sure it's about screwing.
6. Love Em and Leave Em – Screwing and getting the Hell out of town.
7. Mr. Speed - Screwing.(rather quickly, I guess)
8. See You In Your Dreams - Screwing whilst dreaming.
9. Hard Luck Woman - This one's a ballad, so I'll give 'em this one. But when Rags finds her man, you know what they're prolly gonna do? See the next song title.
Last but not least:
10. Makin' Love
I would like to take this opportunity to personally thank KISS not only for the great memories and sparking my imagination at such a young age, but also for the great, educational subject matter of their songs as well.
I should thank Mom and Dad too for being oblivious to this. I can only imagine what they must have thought: "Oooh, KISS and his band are just a bunch of silly cartoon people that spit blood and sing about being monsters! Boys are silly like that and are fascinated with monsters!"
I don't think it was until I was in 6th grade that Mom actually read some of the lyrics. Alls she could do is shake her head and sigh as if to say "Ooooh my, it's probably too late now to help him..."
Thank Gawd for that. If I could give my parents MySpace kudos, I'd give them, like, 3 dozen or something.
