Get your mind out of the gutter, you perv. Okay, now on with today's entry:I've always been an avid user of banana hangers. Bananas are an extremely precious, delicate food and they need to be treated as such. Bananas hanging in the air getting proper circulation = recipe for perfectly ripened bananas.
There's a mysteriously placed plastic hook on my wall in the kitchen above the oven. I couldn't figure out what to put on the hook but it was there, and being the resourceful person I am I felt obligated to make use of it. I invested in some bananas yesterday and placed them on the hook. This is ideal in several ways: I will save on counter space by not using my countertop banana hanger. I also discovered that bananas look pretty awesome hanging on a wall. And to their benefit, there is a very subtle aura of heat always lingering above the stovetop which may serve as a tropical climate emulator and make the bananas feel more at home.
One thing that perplexes me though about banana hangers is what to do when only one banana remains. If you've never used a banana hanger, let me tell you this: you can not hang a single banana on a hook. It's sort of sad, you know. The last banana of the bunch sort of gets the shit end of the stick with this deal. It spends all of its life adjoined to the other bananas and in many cases is just left for dead once it is the only banana to remain. Why? 'Cause you can't hang it. It just sits on the countertop and as each second passes, it ripens faster in the non-ventilated area (i.e. the side resting on the countertop). And in most cases it's already well towards the overly-ripened stage, as it's been around longer than all of the other bananas. Sure, it could go towards a batch of banana bread, but my recipe calls for 3-4 overly ripened bananas, not just one that's extra dark and mushy on one side.
Perhaps it is time for me to invent the better banana hanger. I will take the standard banana hanger and affix a strong clamp upon it with which to suspend the final banana to keep a fresh supply of air around all sides of it at all times.
Attn: Baker's Catalogue. I love your publication and page through it like a dirty old man does to Penthouse. If I were to crank out, say, 200-300 of these new and improved Better Banana Hangers, would you be willing to consign a couple hundred of them? I'd be willing to barter for some good quality King Arthur flour.. Let's make a deal.
